Surely You Gotto be Kidding Me !

It’s Saturday and I am back with another set of actual headlines that make you wonder – would an infinite number of monkeys with an infinite number of typewriters left in a room with infinite time have done a better job?

Let’s start of with a real juicy one:

Corrections official sent to prison for sex with inmate
This is just the kind of story that restores your faith in the justice system.

Shooting reported at firing range
………and loud grunting reported at a Sharapova match…..what are they trying to say anyway?

Woman pleads guilty in fake penis case
Lorena Bobbitt apparently is not very impressed…..why play around with fake ones she says.

Found Guilty Evangelical Christian Navy Chaplain Says Hell Appeal
Proofread did someone before print it went to asks me.

Septic woes lick plans for Windermere ice-cream shop
You never ever want to read the words septic and ice cream in the same sentence…..

Police Hoping To Expose Serial Flasher
This has to be one of their easiest cases ever…..;-)

How a biweekly party for undressed gay men saved a children’s puppetry theater.
Sounds like a heartwarming story from a children’s bed time book written by Michael Jackson, doesn’t it?

Boks must kick the monkey
I don’t understand this one….do they have to actually kick the monkey? Can’t they just give it a gentle tap on the back or something?

Man stabbed with fish
OJ Simpson says – ‘It wasn’t me!!......... I use knives, remember??’

Dickies fights posterior exposure
Hehehehehehehehehehe